amber volakis

when sunlight comes and moves
the little leaves across the
grass, the ground remembers you
and no matter what can ever
drift away, i hold onto the blankets
and i wonder helplessly
how much of everything i loved
about your world was only you
and how empty the afternoons were
that passed behind you
through king’s cross station
with only a breath left to ask
if it was real, or only in my head?
and either way, did it matter
if it was one and the same and
everything i misunderstood seared
permanently into my heart
and i still cry for things
that shouldn’t matter, and we are all
still scared to be alone?